id937-MPs Poem

Written by Gordon   

MPs Poem.

Subject: AN MP's POEM

I want a floating duck house

I want to clear my moat

I need to mend my tennis court

That’s why I need your vote.

--

I have to build a portico

My swimming pool needs mending

My lovely plants need horse manure

And the Aga needs much tending

--

A chandelier is vital

Mock Tudor boards are great

My hanging baskets won awards

And I’ve earned a tax rebate.

--

I need a glitter toilet seat.

My piano so needs tuning

Maltesers help me stay awake

And my orchard must need pruning

--

I could have said the rules were wrong

And often thought I should,

But somehow it was easier

To profit all I could

--

The public really have to see

That the rules are there to test

And by defrauding taxpayers

We were just doing our best

--

The Speaker of the House has gone,

Our sacrificial beast,

But the public are still braying

For our corpses at the feast

--

What do the public want from us,

Those vote-wielding ingrates?

They really should be grateful

To be financing our estates.

--

The message is so very clear,

(we’re merely learning late)

That the British way of living well

Is to screw the bloody state.

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